Community

I’ve written frequently about Sarah’s and my delight at the consistent openness and friendliness of the people we meet here in Chennai and our travel destinations so far in South Asia. We’ve made so many connections with so many people as we walk our neighborhood lanes and the markets and the temple grounds; as we ask the stall-keepers foolish questions; as we mangle the few words of Tamil we think we know; and as we sometimes just watch and let the camera make the connection.

Typically, we might share only a linking of the eyes and a spontaneous smile–and what lovely eyes and delicious, lingering smiles, they give us, whether man or woman–while often never exchanging a single word in a shared language.

And sometimes, I’m rather pointedly ignored.

Yet the connections are made and I now trade many “vanakkams” and “ningal nalamas” as I chart the hundreds of tiny stalls at the Burma Bazaar where the camera stall guy challenges me to a duel at 20 paces;

I reconnect with “the boss of Mylapore” at his usual spot next to the tank at Kapaleeswarar Temple (while Sarah shops for bangles at Sukra;) . . .

and I share another moment with a wise older Brahmin whose smile speaks volumes . . .

And where I had my fortune told . . .

These walkabouts and connections rank as chief joys in our lives here in Besant Nagar and beyond.

But all too often, in our zeal for the new and the exotic, we forget to mention and to thank the many new friends we’ve made at the American International School Chennai (AISC) among the faculty and staff and others in the city. It’s been fascinating to start with essentially zero friends–along with most of the other new teachers–in a strange location on the far side of the world, and to discover shared connections since we’re nearly all expats from somewhere else, all of us away from “home” and extended family, from familiar foods and languages and cultures. Sarah and I have found the local and the expat communities vibrant and welcoming and another source of delight in our lives in Chennai. How often do we get to hang with folks who spent the last few years in Finland or Doha or Croatia, or grew up in Singapore or Delhi or Ecuador? Or attend our first retired-persons meeting (okay, one of us is retired!) to hear our neighbor, Prakash, link his decades with IBM to Vishnu’s philosophy of “your hunger first, not mine?” It’s absolutely true that expanding one’s experience of the world and its people is the best way to both grow as a person and to stay forever young, so we’re indulging ourselves in the wonderful elixir of the local and expat community. (And this year, we get to welcome the newbies of the faculty and staff, and to share our love of Chennai, our favorite restaurants, shopping destinations, and of course those walkabouts.)

Recently, as I approached my 70th birthday, I looked forward to a quiet weekend . . . but alas, on that Friday as I hurried to upload and edit and publish photos at AISC from the morning’s assignments so I could leave by noon, Shannon, the head of the communications team, sent me another short-notice shoot–brick pavers, of all things, with inscriptions of the donors who support the school. Was there a ceremony, a deadline, I asked? Nope, we’re just doing five bricks a day, she said. Well, since I’m pretty busy, could I do this next week? Sorry, but the staff is there to wash them off and make them nice and shiny . . . So, down I went, mumbling about silly bricks, and found no one washing anything. Anywhere. So I called and confirmed the location, then called again when still no one arrived after several minutes. As Sarah will tell you, patience has never been one of my virtues!

Anyway, when I was finally allowed to return to the office, I was greeted by several of the faculty and staff, and with a shiny silver SEVEN-ZERO and HAPPY BIRTHDAY on the wall, along with photos of Sarah and me back in our college days! Not to mention an opulent birthday cake. I can’t recall ever having a surprise birthday party in my seven decades, so a wonderful way to ring in my next year and a big thanks to the community at AISC.

Then, on Saturday evening, we attended a birthday party for Priya, a staff member, friend, and our honorary middle daughter. Probably forty of her friends crowded a tapas restaurant in Gopalapuram, celebrating and toasting Priya. Finally, the wait staff came out in a line, following the birthday cake glowing with candles. They paraded around the restaurant and at last headed to our long table . . . and set the cake down in front of me with a wish for my own birthday! Another wonderful surprise and many thanks to Priya for sharing her birthday with me.

Finally, on Sunday–my actual birthday–Sarah and I were joined by a few other couples for brunch at the Leela Palace, where dim sum and rock lobster and creme brûlée and lively conversation flowed along with seemingly endless Prosecco. A wonderful time with friends and a bubbly conclusion to a weekend of celebration and community.

So, yes, as Sarah and I have said, Chennai–and this community–are, indeed, now our home. Of course, part of our camaraderie with new friends is our shared enjoyment of the wonder of travel, of exotic and challenging new places, and discovering so many new faces. So, next week, we’re off for more exploration as we head to Sri Lanka . . . And a dinner at another of Asia’s Top 50 restaurants . . . but you know that’s another story, right?